HOW TO NOT BE TALKATIVE

Understanding the reasons behind your excessive talking is crucial to overcoming it. You can't modify a habit without first comprehending its fundamental causes. There are numerous factors that may cause someone to talk excessively.


The first item on the list of reasons why you might talk so much is a lack of impulse control, and it makes sense that it should be the first thing you try to fix. To manage your urge, you must learn to take a conscious break every time you open your mouth to speak, whether you are acting on impulse or not.


Not interrupting people is crucial. This is connected to impulse control, but it's especially important when someone else is talking and you start talking over them. Alternatively, you may finish people's sentences for them rather than letting them complete their points. In these situations, another approach to handle it is to wait for a moment of quiet before speaking.


It's worth learning how to accept when other people have ideas that differ from yours if you tend to chat a lot while engaged in a quarrel. Because many issues are subjectively resolved, you should attempt to see how someone else might reach a different conclusion than you.


When you talk, make sure you've given it some thought. If you speak a lot in order to gain the approval of others, there's a good chance you need to work on your self-esteem issues.


Self-esteem is our opinion of ourselves. Some people with low self-esteem talk a lot so that others will agree with them or at the very least listen to them.


Do you feel like you talk too much? Do other people tell you that you need to be quiet more often? If so, don't worry – you're not alone. Many people struggle with this issue, and it can be difficult to know how to change it.


In this article, we will discuss why people tend to be talkative and how they can work on becoming less talkative. We will also provide some tips for how to deal with this problem if it is causing difficulty in your life.

Why Am I Talkative?


Some people are simply more talkative. Researchers discovered that females have more communication-related FOXP2 genes than males. This may be one of the reasons why girls are more inclined to chat. However, having a natural ability to talk does not imply that you have poor control over yourself.


You can certainly talk less if you are asked to do so. You can learn and put into practice improved listening skills. There may be a variety of reasons why someone is a chatterbox. It's possible that they're anxious, or that they have a lot of vitality and interest in the topic at hand.


You might be wondering if it's good to be talkative. Well, it depends on who you ask! Some people might say that being talkative is a great way to make friends and learn new information. Others might say that too much talking can annoy people or lead to gossiping. In my article Is it good to be talkative?, I explore the benefits of being talkative. Some of these benefits include happiness, connection, and learning.


Some people are just more extroverted than others and enjoy interacting with other humans. Whatever the cause, there are methods for limiting how much you talk if you find yourself compelled to do so.


Paying attention to how much you talk and making an attempt to give others a chance to speak can help you become a better listener while also lowering the amount of talking you do. Anyone can learn to curb their desire to chatter non-stop with time!


Mindfulness has been found to aid with anxiety. It allows you to be more grounded and in the present moment, rather than getting caught up in blaming yourself for the past or stressing about a future that you can't influence. It's also simple to understand: follow our simple Guide to Mindfulness instructions.


To assist their patients to be more in their bodies and relax, some therapists utilize the technique of ‘progressive muscular relaxation.’ Read our guide on how to relax in record time (in a few minutes or less!).


Self-esteem may be enhanced by practicing self-compassion, the art of treating ourselves like a friend. It aids in communication as well. The more we are courteous and forthcoming with ourselves, the easier it is to be so with others.


Ironically, although therapy is all about talking, it helps if you talk too much. It allows you to feel more self-aware and secure, so you have less to prove. It also aids in the recognition and resolution of important issues that stimulate your creativeness, such as embarrassment and childhood abuse.


Therapy can also assist with ADHD, and there are specific treatments developed just to address a borderline personality disorder if that is your problem.

How to Stop Talkative?

 

Usually, there is a predictable rhythm to the flow of conversation. One person speaks, then pauses to allow someone else to have a turn before speaking again, much like in a game when players take turns but if someone doesn't give you the chance to talk without being interrupted, it might consume a lot of emotional energy and make you feel drained.

 

Someone's over-talking could prevent you from getting any work done or deprive you of the peace and quiet times during your day when you can finally get some personal time. If someone's nattering affects your time or emotional well-being on a regular basis, it may be the moment to do something about it.

 

If you establish clear expectations for others, most individuals who like to speak a lot will appreciate them. Setting explicit limits for yourself allows you greater control over your conversations from the outset.

 

It's aggravating when people just don't get the hint. It might be tough to inform someone they've gone too far, but if your time isn't being respected, you have a right to defend your boundaries and it's time to be more aggressive. It's fine if you don't want it to be. If you don't want to be, then it's best not to be.

 

If you find yourself in a situation where someone is talking too much, or you're feeling uncomfortable, don't be afraid to redirect the conversation back to the subject at hand, interrupt them, or firmly conclude the talk at the next pause.

 

It might be that you have to interact with excessive talkers on a regular basis, for example, if they’re a housemate, friend, or co-worker. In this case, it’s really important that you take some personal space from them if you need to.

 

You can strengthen your nails by practicing self-care methods. You may also recharge your energy by doing something relaxing, such as meditation or walking, pursuing a hobby or interest that makes you happy, or spending time with other friends and family.

 

It's vital to keep in mind that chronic talkers don't want to be unpleasant on purpose; they simply enjoy interacting with people and telling their stories.

 

They may be lonely or socially ignorant. Whatever the reason, show kindness to others. Be patient but firm in your boundaries; you'll be well on your way to more pleasant conversations.

Can You Become Less Talkative?

 

Humans have an inherent need to communicate. It helps you keep social connections, but it's also a way to deal with feelings of anxiety and tension. Consider whether you might be chatting because you're nervous or embarrassed and then develop new habits that will help you feel more calm and confident.

 

The desire to talk is frequently a consequence of being overly stimulated by things you see on Twitter, such as a viral video on YouTube, a Snapchat snap, or anything else similar. Take some time away from the distractions and reconnect with yourself.

 

If your coworkers, friends, and family seem to be losing interest in what you have to say, keep a diary. Learn how to convey yourself while still controlling how you express yourself to others.

 

If you're uncomfortable in silence, you'll feel internal pressure to fill the void with words. You then talk excessively as a result of the unpleasant feelings generated by the silence. Fortunately, through practice, you may master how to sit with these emotions.

 

You free up your focus on the individual you're talking to and for improved listening when you quiet your speech and concentrate less on attracting attention to yourself.

 

Picking up on changes in a person's usual behavior, such as their voice, face, or body language, is something great listeners are excellent at. As you listen, adapt to them accordingly.

 

You can also assist others by being non-judgmental during your responses. You will prevent them from shutting down and give them a sense of freedom and acceptance. Also, they will have acceptance for you.

 

When you are communicating through a medium, keep in mind that it is there to create an impact rather than simply convey information. Choose when it's appropriate to listen and when it's acceptable to reply and ask follow-up questions. The importance of timing and restraint cannot be overstated.

 

If your counterpart suggests that they want to talk, respond by doing something to demonstrate that you're paying attention. Close the book you're reading or put down your phone.

 

When you're on a call, try to avoid saying things that might reflect poorly. Listen carefully to what's going on around you and pay attention to the people who are talking. Try thinking twice before speaking so as not to make a mistake.

 

Interrupting appears to be talking over someone or putting your thoughts into the conversation before your turn. Allow the individual to talk; you will get your chance to add and avoid making the other person feel discredited in this manner.

 

Keep the discussion on track. Talk about what makes sense and avoid using instances that may appear irrelevant, unreasonable, or confusing. Give clear facts and straightforward reasoning to aid the listener in forming some notion of what you're talking about.

How to be Less Talkative?

 

It's common to talk, and it aids in the communication of thoughts and ideas. However, talking excessively in certain situations might be perceived as a negative quality.

 

When someone expresses themselves too much, they may come across as pushy or as though others aren't being given a chance to talk.

 

Regardless of the case, being excessively talkative might make people doubt your words. It's critical to learn when to shut up if you want others to respect you as a speaker.

 

There are a few things you can do to speak less. One approach is to practice paying attention more. Instead of thinking about what you'll say next while in a conversation, pay close attention to what the other person is saying.

 

Another approach is to avoid being interrupted. Interrupt the other person only when they've finished their thought. It's also a good idea to wait your turn before diving into the discussion. When everyone is talking at once, no one is really listening or learning anything from the exchange.

 

Finally, before expressing your own viewpoint, try summarizing what others have stated. This indicates that you were listening and comprehending what was said.

Can You be a Talkative Introvert?

 

Introverts who are talkative can be tough to understand. They enjoy socializing, but only with the appropriate people. That is why one-on-one time is their best friend since one-on-one encounters allow for deeper, more meaningful discussions that satisfy their desire to socialize without having to deal with small talk or excessive attention.

 

Even though a stimulating discussion may be sparked at a party or group gathering, it's difficult to keep the talk going. Conversation lovers frequently show up and it just never goes the way it was supposed to. However, grabbing a bite to eat or going somewhere with just one other person will reveal a different and unexpectedly appealing side to the talkative introvert.

 

They enjoy being in a setting where they can lose themselves in conversation with someone since they will talk about something fascinating or interesting to them for hours. There are no interruptions, and there is no small talk. When it's just the two of you, they're the ones who typically come out of their shells.

 

Introverts are known for feeling drained after spending too much time in social situations. Talkative introverts may be most at ease with a wind-up toy. The proper things will excite and bring them out of their shells, but they will always be introverts.

 

It's draining to interact socially. It's not uncommon for someone to vanish into thin air, then pop back out again. This is a recharging technique in action. People frequently misinterpret things as if they are enraged, irritated, or offended by something.

 

They are, however, frequently just physically and mentally exhausted. This is standard behavior for the introverted individual who isn't chatty. It's good to learn what makes those who are frequently seen but seldom spoken of tick. They might seem more introverted, going from being completely engaged to turtle shell mode, but it's probably nothing personal.

Can You be Shy and Talkative?


Introverts may be the most talkative in the room, according to certain personality types. Personality is an intriguing concept. While introverts are often thought of as quiet and timid, this is not always the case, especially if there are cultural reasons, common interests with others, and a preference for smaller groups.


To begin with, and most importantly, there is frequently a muddled distinction between introversion and shyness. Introversion refers to people drawing energy and power from within themselves.


Introverts prefer a calm, controlled environment inside their minds. When introverts are engaged with the external world, they lose energy. They are fatigued by external stimuli.


They are typically at their most satisfied when they're alone or in the company of a few close friends. It has nothing to do with a fear of other people. It's all about emotional energy.


Shyness, on the other hand, is about dread. People who are shy are concerned with performing or saying the wrong thing in front of others. They may put a lot of pressure on what others think of them. It's all related to a person's fear of others.


Both introverted people and shy persons tend to withdraw, albeit for somewhat different reasons. Introversion and shyness may appear similar on the surface since both Introverts and timid individuals tend to withdraw.


If Introverts are Turbulent, they might also act like a bashful person by caring too much about the thoughts of others.


However, that is the Turbulent identity speaking, and it has nothing to do with Introversion. Nonetheless, it's no surprise that introversion and shyness are frequently conflated due to these similarities.


Shyness can be a major barrier to success in life, preventing you from achieving your goals and dreams. Many people are shy, but this doesn't have to hold you back. You can learn how to be more talkative and overcome your shyness. In my article How to be more talkative, I outline 5 simple steps that will help you become more outgoing and communicative. These tips are based on scientific research, so they are guaranteed to work for you.

How To Not Be Talkative - Conclusion


There are many reasons why a person might talk so much. Maybe it's nerves, maybe you're an extrovert, or maybe you're just used to being the center of attention. Whatever the reason, talking too much can be frustrating for both you and the people around you.


If you're looking for ways to cut back on the amount you speak, start by trying to understand the root cause of your excessive talking. Once you know why you're doing it, you can begin to work on changing your behavior.


Additionally, make an effort to be more aware of how often you speak and try to limit yourself to only speaking when it's absolutely necessary. With a little bit of effort, you can learn how to not be talkative and enjoy a more balanced conversation.


However, there are times when it is better to be concise. If you are in a meeting or giving a presentation, it is important to be clear and concise so that people can understand your message.


When you are talking to someone one-on-one, you also want to be clear and concise so that the other person can understand you and feel connected to the conversation.


In general, less is more when it comes to speech. People will appreciate a short, concise message that gets to the point.